Romo and Simpson are married

I don't know if I should should laugh or puke. Rumor has it that Dallas Cowboys quarterback Tony Romo and Jessica, hot piece of ass but dumb as nails, Simpson are getting married. Tina Simpson, Jessica's mother is like her husband. She'll whore out her daughters as long as she get paid. So when TMZ.COM caught up her and Jessica leaving Chili's in Los Angeles, Tina Simpson opened up yapper and said that Tony and Jessica were married.

Awwww.

Then of course TMZ.COM stalked out Nick Lachey and asked him if its true. He then replied, "I don't give flying...." okay no he didn't. Nick said, "Well I guess if my mom said it, it must be true!"

God I hope either of them are sterile. There are ants that have higher IQ's than Tony Romo and Jessica Simpson have the combined!

Nevertheless, if it is true. Congratulations to Tony and Jessica.

Source: azcentral.com

No More Hippies In The NFL

Well it looks like the NFL is not allowing hippies anymore. After the Steelers vs Chiefs game where Troy Polamalu got his hair pulled when being tackled by Kansas City's Larry Johnson, the Kansas City proposed a rule that long hair should no longer be allowed in games. I have to agree. Who wants to watch a bunch of dudes running around pulling each others hair? If I wanna see some hair pulling, I would rather see each teams' cheerleaders in a oil wrestling match against each other.

I do agree with the Chiefs on this one. Long hair does not belong on the field. You are at risk for getting it yanked out. And honestly if you have long hair, don't go crying that you got it pulled. Big fucking babies. In fact, I think the NFL should penalize people with long hair by making them wear pink jerseys. Here is one for you Troy.


















Source: Yahoo Sports

Why I think Eli Manning should be the next Madden NFL Cover Boy

It's simple, The Madden Curse. Since Vince Young didn't suffer too badly (as you can see here) I think that the curse is going to hit extra strong on the next person. As I bow my head at my EA Sports and Tiburon alter I pray "please please please please PLEASE let it be Eli Manning". The way I see it, it'll be a horrific career ending injury. I don't want him crippled like Dennis Byrd's injury (lucky he recovered, that was a brutal impact) as that's just too horrific. But a nice Joe Theisman would do the trick. So Eli! I'm pullin' for ya' big boi.

The NFL is Rigged (part 2)

As I stated boldly earlier, The NFL is rigged as proven by having Mannings win back to back Superbowls. What a crock! I don't want to get into it again, what I do want to get into is more evidence. Let's look at the Rams and the Titans. As the Los Angeles Rams, they were the joke of the NFL, much like the 49ers and Dolphins of today. You'd hear things like "Why are the rams like a tampon? They are only good for one period and they don't have a second string." Meanwhile, the then Oilers were always a team that you could never take lightly, but at the same time, they were never any threat to go all the way. Sorry, Moon, you'll always be considered one of my favorite quarterbacks in football, but you fumbled way too much (note, Warren Moon is the NFL fumble king). So, now you have two teams that good teams like the then Niners, Cowboys, Packers, Giants, Broncos, Dolphins, and the ungodly Bills (4 back to back superbowl appearances! GOOD GRAVY!) never really batted an eye at. So now we have the first thread of this conspiracy.

Fortunately, this one isn't as deep as some of the others, but still, for all you blind fans out there, OPEN YOUR EYES! Here's the second part. The midwest during the 80's and 90's didn't have any teams worth squat, and most of those moved away. The fans were starting to migrate to other sports like Baseball, Hockey, and Lacrosse. That's a lot of money that the NFL was looking at loosing, so in a brain buster move by the NFL, the Oilers and the Rams relocate to Tennessee and St. Louis respectively. Oilers in a place the NFL has never been, and the Rams to fill the hole the Cardinals left behind. Then the Oilers change their name the following season to the Titans, and then out of the blue, two chump teams filled with chump players suddenly become superstars and take over? I call Bull $#!t on this one. Look at those players stats after the short run both teams had, they were all a synchronized flash in the pan. That doesn't happen in real life, but it sure does if you are following a script.

Anyway, I hope that your eyes are starting to open more. I think it's time for me to start watching the CFL and Arena Football, bet those aren't scripted (or nearly as much so).

Sports Assassin!

Shaun Alexander needs to grow a brain

So it would appear the Shaun Alexander is wondering what is up with the recent additions of running-backs Julius Jones and T.J. Duckett.

Shaun....GROW A FREAKIN' BRAIN!

Your last two years have been PATHETIC. You are injury prone, and when you are not injured, you deliver a lackluster performance. Your great running skill has given the Seattle Seahawks a pathetic ranking in rush yardage. Seattle averaged just 4.0 yards per carry in 2006 and 3.8 last season. Mike Holmgren isn't retarded. He gave you your chance. The passing offense still delivers, its time for you to step up to the plate.

My guess is that Shaun Alexander is getting fired, or Holmgren is using Duckett and Jones to light a fire under Alexander's ass.

Source: Yahoo Sports

UPDATE: Trent Green to remain a Ram!

A few days ago I posted that Trent Green was going to be with the Green Bay Packers. Well before Green Bay could whip out the pen, St. Louis decided to sign the concussion-prone Trent Green to a 3 year deal. He will play backup quarterback for Mark Bulger. Trent Green replaces Gus Frerotte as Bulger's backup. My question is, why is Gus Frerotte even playing still?

Madden curse to be broken?

So I guess the New York Giants are looking to break the "Madden Curse". They are looking to pick up David Carr as a backup to Eli Manning.

Wow. So much for winning back to back Super Bowls eh? I guess since the coach secured a nice fat contract, he doesn't care about the team anymore. David Carr was the starting quarterback that got beat out by retired 44 year old veteran Vinnie Testaverde.

I.....I am speechless.

Source: Yahoo Sports

Can't the 49ers ever do anything right?

As reported in The Mercury News the (lack of) brains in the front office of the San Francisco 49ers have signed yet another old as dirt wide receiver. This would be 36 year old (that's a hell of a lot of candles to place on that cake) Isaac Bruce. Ten years ago this would be something great. A kick ass receiver in the prime of his game. But now? Seriously? When you need to get a legitimate receiver for the future? Hell, they need two good ones and a solid slot receiver for backup and three receiver sets. Right now the top of their receiving corps needs fibercon, bran muffins and oxygen tanks just to get them through each down, let alone a season. Sure Bruce and Darrell Jackson can catch a ball, great receivers can do that at any point in their careers, but they no longer have the speed or agility to burn the corners that are covering them...well, at least not by mid way through the second 3 and out drive that we're sure to see. Hell, I wouldn't be surprised to see the corners jogging when covering and the safties playing Tiddlywinks between downs.

But Manly...what about the running game? Mike Martz is pretty much a zero run offensive cordinator who plays the vertical game. He likes his receivers tall and fast and the running back is simply another down field threat, so Gore, hope you like trying to sell the play action 15-30 times a week or so. Sure it worked in St. Louis, and maybe by reuniting Martz with many of the vets that were a part of the Rams Superstar seasons might help the young guns a bit...but based on what we've seen so far from these players? Might look more like Pee wee football all over again *envisions all these crimson and gold uniforms swarming the ball*.

Manly, you're not being fair...what about the quarter back? What about him? If you're talking about Alex Smith, I've said for two season now to bench the bum. He's a total waste of time and effort. He has no confidence in his linemen (and for good reason), in his 32 games he's been sacked 81 times. That's just over two and a half sacks per game, and he's considered a scrambler...good thing or that number would be WAY higher. Imagine where Joe Montana would be with an offensive line like that? *shudders* but that doesn't change the fact that with Smith at the helm the niners loose miserably, usually by the arm of Smith. The only flash of hope last season comes with Shaun Hill, wearing lucky number thirteen. In his three games, he got a 101.6 QB rating and two of the teams five wins. So, sit Smith on his cry baby ass and let Hill sink or swim. He's more than earned the right to fight for Smith's millions. And why oh why did the niners even opt to pick up on Smith's options, with his crying and fighting with Nolan, even after signing Hill to a contract with performance incentives?

But Manly...what about the defense? Oh please! I've already blogged enough about the craptastic job that the niners front office has done with offense (worst in the NFL over all, dead last in points, total offensive yards and passing yards, and fifth lowest in rushing yards)...let's give them some oxygen, fibercon and a nap to prepare for the second round with me (better in defense, but still 20th in points allowed, 25th in yards allowed and that breaks down to a beatiful 22nd in both passing yards and rushing yards individually). Maybe I'll give them a break, after all, every team deserves one every once in a while, and I'm sure this upcoming 2008 season won't offer one.

Packers to acquire Trent Green as QB. Aaron Rodgers not scared

Yeah I wouldn't be scared if the Packers brought Trent Green on either. Granted Aaron Rodgers has some big shoes to fill, being the backup QB for Favre for 5 years, I am sure Brett has taught him a thing or three. Don't expect Aaron Rodgers to come out like a gunslinger....But I feel the Packers will be safe. Trent Green has the experience behind him. But, um, that's really about it. He's not THAT GREAT of a quarterback. Oh well. They could do worse, and bring in Brian Greise.

Falcons cut Harrington, no one surprised

The Atlanta Falcons have cut QB Joey Harrington. He was acquired last year by the Falcons in April of 2007. Once a first-round pick out of the University of Oregon in the 2002 NFL Draft, Joey Harrington's career has been craptacular. With76 career starts at quarterback and more than 14,500 passing yards and 79 touchdown passes. His career passer rating is 70.5. Wait a minute. Okay, so I guess there are starting quarterbacks out there that are worse than Eli Manning.

Source: Yahoo Sports

Warren Sapp retires....and no one cares

Starting Defensive Tackle for the Oakland Raders, Warren Sapp, has announced that he is retiring. Sapp posted on his web site two words, “I’M DONE”. Apparently after the Raiders game in San Diego, he told the players and staff that he was retiring.

Sapp spent nine seasons with Tampa Bay. But like most NFL players, he got greedy and wanted more money. He decided to become a free agent and signed with the Raiders, where he was garbage. Actually you can’t blame Warren Sapp for having such lackluster seasons when he signed with the Oakland Raiders. I mean its hard when you are the only good player on your defense.

Source: Yahoo Sports

FINALLY!!!

Well its official….Brett Favre has retired from the Green Bay Packers and the NFL after 17 years of playing.

Packers.Com has a list of records that Brett has accomplished:

Here's a list of those significant league records:

Most TD passes: 442
Favre surpassed Dan Marino's mark of 420 in Week 4 last season at Minnesota, with a 16-yard TD pass to Greg Jennings.

Most passing yards: 61,655
Favre connected with his old buddy Donald Driver to break Marino's mark of 61,361 yards at St. Louis last season in Week 15.

Most passing attempts: 8,758
Favre also broke this one last year in Week 4 at the Metrodome, and finished exactly 400 passes ahead of Marino (8,358).

Most wins by a starting QB: 160
Favre eclipsed John Elway's previous mark of 148 in Week 2 last season against the New York Giants. Including postseason, Favre won 172 games. Manning is tops among active QBs with 105 regular-season wins.

Most consecutive starts, quarterback: 253 (275 including playoffs)
The next-longest streak for a QB belongs to Manning, at 160 games (173 including playoffs) and counting. Among all players and documented streaks, Favre came up 17 games shy of Minnesota's Jim Marshall, who started 270 straight contests.

Most 3,000-yard passing seasons: 16
Marino ranks second on this list with 13.

Most consecutive 3,000-yard passing seasons: 16
Manning broke a second-place tie with Marino last season with his 10th in a row.

Most pass completions: 5,377
Favre surpassed Marino's 4,967 completions two seasons ago, with a pass to Carlyle Holiday against Detroit on Dec. 17, 2006, at Lambeau Field.

Most seasons with 30-plus TD passes: 8
Marino and Manning are both a distant second here with four each.

Most consecutive games with a TD pass, postseason: 18
Favre extended this by two more games last season. Once again, Marino is in second place with 13.

Most NFL MVP awards: 3
Six other players, the only active ones being quarterbacks Manning and Kurt Warner, have won the award twice. Favre was runner-up to Tom Brady in 2007 for a potential fourth MVP.